Originally written way back in '89 maybe? On the elbows mailing
list... A little piece of history. Also known as one of the weirdest
pick up lines ever.
_H*
actually, i prefer
Subject: excuse me?
Larry, upon hearing this new phrase, commented, "oh yeah, well fuck me with
a 19 inch spiked obelisk playing Amazing Grace dipped in curare."
corwin
oh yeah? well fuck me with a 19 inch spiked obelisk that has been
dipped in curare and continues playing Amazing Grace in four part
harmony ...
never mind (ouch)
kelly
Oh yeah? Well fuck me up the ass with a broken four foot Galliano bottle with
spikes and raised pleasure dots, playing Amazing Grace in four part harmony
with feelin' and knobs on.
(beat that)
Oh yeah, I forgot the curare.
corwin
i believe i hear the trumpet of challenge, Mr. Coburn ...
well, fuck me up the ass with a five foot flaming peace pipe coated
with petroleum products, sandpaper, barbed fish hooks and curare and
playing Amazing Grace in four part harmony with feelin', orchestral
accompanyment, and knobs to adjust the intensity ...
(so there)
kelly
Oh yeah?
Well, fuck me up the ass over and over again with a six foot flaming,
broken Galiano bottle, covered with spikes, barbs, hooks, old rusty
razor blades, used syringes, and curare, playing Amazing Grace in five
part harmony with feelin', orchestral accompanyment, and the Vienna
Boys Choir, with dials, buttons, keys, a joy stick, and knobs to adjust the
intensity, depth, rate, and length of exposure.
And the name's corwin.
corwin
Subject: hmmmmmm ....
here goes, corwin (are you ready for this?) ...
you can just fuck me up the ass with a seven foot asbestos filled,
napalm coated broken Galiano bottle covered with sandpaper, spikes,
barbs, hooks, old rusty razor blades, used syringes, electrically
charged copper coils, anonymous pubic hair, and curare that's playing
Amazing Grace like a barbershop quartet with feelin' and Boston Pops'
orchestral accompanyment using the Vienna Boys Choir to keep time, so
the bunch of line backers ramming it in and playing with the dials,
buttons, keyes, joy stick, knobs, mouse and conducting baton that all
adjusts the intensity, depth, rate, length and HARDNESS can push in
proper rhythm while moving through a temporal loop putting it all
through eternity, then back to the beginning to start again ...
(pant pant)
kelly
Oh baby, your place or mine?
corwin