Path: quartz.ucs.ualberta.ca!tribune.usask.ca!canopus.cc.umanitoba.ca!newsflash.concordia.ca!utcsri!utnut!cs.utexas.edu!howland.reston.ans.net!news2.near.net!satisfied.elf.com!kjc From: kjc@ [ELF DOT COM] (Kelly J. Cooper) Newsgroups: talk.bizarre Subject: nth IcE.BoB report Date: 30 Jan 1995 06:04:21 GMT Organization: Elf Communications Lines: 111 Message-ID: <3ghvh5$dmj@satisfied.elf.com> NNTP-Posting-Host: asylum.sf.ca.us "Your people I do not understand, So to you I shall put an end And you will never hear surf music again." - Jimi Hendrix Hell and bloody damnfire. Either I posted a review of the ICE.BOB to all of usenet or the machine ate it. But it wasn't my fault! It was a conspiracy on the part of Alternet, Rutgers, and the makers of Emacs, Editor for a Better World! I ran out of gas! I got a flat tire! There was an earthquake! A terrible flood! Locusts! It wasn't my fault! However, since I haven't been flamed, I'm gonna guess that something otherworldly and sinister happened to it. But it's not worth my life to dive into the bit bucket and find it, so I'll try again. (Post-writing nota bene - this one almost bit the digital dust as well - I'm beginning to worry for my safety and sanity). It just WON'T be the SAME since I was working on my swing shift when I wrote it originally, and I had SOMEHOW managed to RE-CREATE the SENSATIONS of the ICE.BOB using ONLY my IMAGNINATION and FATIGUE TOXINS. WhoooWHEEEE, I sure got the blues this MORNIN' baby... It's been over a week and I still can't shake the feeling of little newts skittering UP and down my spine. I eschewed any Friday evening BOB activities in favor of sleeping as late in the day as possible, then watching the X-FILES and making FROOT LOOP SQUARES. [Hang on a sec. I seem to having some sort of fetish issue with the caps lock key.] Ok. So, I make sticky, unnatural food, then worked from midnight until noon. Stopped off in Cambridge to bathe, then launched toward Ayer. Got lost in downtown Ayer for a bit, enjoyed the town in its Saturday afternoon glory and was given brief directions by a toothless local to re-attach my pointers. Arrived at the BOB shivering hard >from having the windows open to keep myself awake. Noticed the fire worshippers on the porch before entering Casa Vail, two pans of unnatural food in hand (which hardly anyone seems to remember - more evidence for the influence of controlled substances on the short term memories of certain individuals). A surprising number of people not only tried the Froot Loop squares but also _enjoyed_ them. (I must admit, I enjoy the sugar buzz myself. Got one right now, in fact. Can you tell?) Caught the tail end of the basement jam (from the kitchen, where it was quite clearly audible), slapped a name tag on my self and started listening to conversations, rudely interrupting with my own input as often as possible. I got to flame about shit spreading and goat mucking while others went on about a variety of topics. Small children capered about. Random impressions: melting M's (too small to have the full M&M logo) in the Little Anthony AutoShrine, Mel Gibson's glowing LEDs following me around the room, newts mit volcano, Babs Woods (a woman of whom I am in awe - she could talk wallpaper off plaster) sharply contrasting John Woods, Paul Lord was ultra casual, Corprew Reed amused the kitchen with his heinous blind date fiasco story, Mr. Rone and Heckler were quite wound up, ljd has excellent tatoos, there was much cuteness abounding between folks and the babes were all as pretty as I expected them to be, there was almost never any place to sit, a lot of folks got their feet rubbed, the pseudo lesbian porn was - ah - interesting, gooey sticky things were handed around the room several times, noise was impressively constant, conversations interesting, and experimental mutations kept under control. A lot of other people made impressions. I just can't sort them all right now - if ever, considering it's been a week already. A lot of them are actually sort of blended together (but I won't mention who's confused with whom in my head cuz it would be rude). (Although, for some reason, Mr. Rone looked as I expected (yes I had expectations - I can't control my brain all the time) and was in fact the only person who did. I don't know why.) I managed to orbit the house a number of times, got a grand tour from our esteemed host, gazed in wonder upon the paintings, observed and experienced the narrow furniture, mocked Zed (as is my custom), tasted something not unlike a mixture of vodka and mouthwash courtesy of Gooley, ate a lot of random but tasty foods, wandered in and out of the house to watch ljd's pyromaniacal tendencies, and didn't actually try the HAW flakes until nearly everyone had already left (I was just about the last to leave and therefore the honorary recipient of a leftover party favor - originating I believe from the Gooley package - which was a plastic disk with a picture of a unicorn etched into one side to give the other side a 3-D kind of appearance. For reasons I refuse to go into, this is really, really funny). None of these things happened in the order that I listed them. I realized I'd been up somewhere on the order of 30-some-odd hours before I vanished from the communal atmosphere to enjoy a little privacy (the details of the rest of my evening I will judiciously excise from my post). I unfortunately missed breakfast and therefore most of the tearful good-byes, but I must say that overall, it was a most excellent party and I think I'd like to experience the phenomena again. Kelly J. Cooper (aka Kafka Dreams) "Polonius: Madam, I swear I use no art at all. That he is mad, 'tis true: 'tis true 'tis pity, And pity 'tis 'tis true -- a foolish figure." - Shakespeare, HAMLET II.ii.97-99